Monday, April 20, 2009

Grab a Kleenex...or 20

Well, it's finally hitting me...

I have been dreading 2009 since that hot August day back in 1996 when I walked Tyler into his first day of Kindergarten and handed him over to the absolute meanest woman who ever walked the face of this earth!  (Now, this was at a previous school, so all you CPA-moms can relax..haha.)  Anyway, after I left Tyler there that day, I came home and quickly calculated the year he'd graduate....and ever since, I've secretly subtracted every school-year checked off and every birthday checked off from 2009, dreading the day.  Not really dreading graduation, but dreading the year he'd spread his wings and I'd push him out of this comfy little nest I've nurtured him in for 18 1/2 years.  All you older moms who've gone before me know exactly the pain I'm describing.

Well, in what seemed like the blink of an eye, his senior year had begun...about 3 weeks after we brought Macy Li home from China last August, to be exact.  All school year long, I've been really proud of myself for not being overly emotional about this being Tyler's last school year and last year at home.  You see, I'm a real sap.  It's typical for me to be the one falling apart at every sentimental moment and milestone.  I boo-hoo when I see a school bus filled with little faces, or whenever a kid from the opposing team hits a home-run, or when I watch my kid's sleeping...or when I see a serviceman in the airport, or at complete stranger's blogs I read,....I'm just that way.  I can't help it.  But I guess with the diversion of a new baby, my extended illness back in the fall, and life moving at light-speed, I really haven't had a whole lot of time to sit and be overly comtemplative this year and therefore have not begun the grief I've been dreading for so long.

Tyler's senior year has been filled with many "lasts"...the last senior parent coffees, the last football game, the last game played in our home stadium, the last football banquet, the last Christmas break,  the last Spring Break, the last semester, the last grading period (woo-hoo!), the last Powder Puff game, the last meetings with guidance/college counselors, the last everything....I've managed to pull through all those like a trooper.  I might have shed a tear or three, but I've yet to be hit with that sadness that so many moms who've gone before me have described.  I remember this past New Year's Eve, ringing in "2009," and thinking, "Oh dear Lord, this is the year I've been dreading since Tyler was in Kindergarten...Oh Lord, please help me not to be an emotional basket-case!  I want this year to be about Tyler; not me!"  

Anyway, I have been doing great...until this morning.  Last night was their Senior Banquet. This is a very special event for the CPA seniors and has been a long tradition for our school.  It's a wonderful night where they have a fabulous catered dinner at the home of one of the seniors, there's a special reflective video capturing all of the graduates throughout their child-hood years to present, etc.  At the end of the evening, our "almost graduates" were given the Dr. Seuss book,  OH THE PLACES YOU'LL GO, and then they all hung around and wrote little notes of "memories shared" in each other's books.  
So this morning when Tyler left for school, he handed me the book and said I could read what his friends had written.  Yes!  This was gonna be good!  So, in my typical fashion, I grabbed a fleece blanket, a cup of joe, and Macy Li's monitor and headed out to the front porch where I plopped down in my rocking chair and began to pour over some of the sweetest words ever written, while enjoying the peaceful sound of the Spring rain that was pouring.  (Bear in mind that these kids have grown up together in a small, Christian, K-12 school and most started there in Kindergarten.  Tyler started in 3rd grade.  So while these kids have "done life" together, so too, we families have "done life" together.  We are all very intertwined in one another's lives.)

There was the note from the "1st crush," , the note from the soon-to-be-roomies at Samford University, the note from the boy he used to play in the creek with, the notes from fellow football-brothers, and the note from the first girlfriend, and the note from the first prom date, and the note from the boy who he and Tyler nearly hated each other when they were little but God has brought them so close, the note from the boy who was with him in the church nursery when they were mere babies, the notes from the twins who lost their mom after 3rd grade and have literally grown up with Tyler since and are like my own sons, the note from the boy who lost his 5-year-old-adopted little sister last May in a tragic accident, the note from the girl who's mom died suddenly this past fall and was a teacher at our school, the notes from his study-partners, and on and on...

Each of these kids is very close and very dear to Tyler, and therefore to us.  All the precious notes were profoundly sweet.  All were profoundly sentimental.  Each note was filled with maturity, and depth of character, and joy, and thankful hearts, and hearts full of the sweet memories of days gone by.  Each note had the ring of a young adult.  Each note celebrated the past, but more importantly, looked forward with great hope toward the future.  

It didn't take long before I was completely overcome with emotion.  Like the Spring rain, my tears were pouring.  I was flooded with sweet memories...flooded with thoughts of how much suffering this class has walked through together...flooded with amazement with how they have held each other up in the midst of unspeakable pain...flooded with gratitude of how they've fought the good fight arm-in-arm...flooded with laughter of all the oodles of hilarious moments they and we have all shared...flooded with humility at seeing what incredible adults they've all grown to be...flooded with a thankful heart for all the forgiveness I've watched them freely give...flooded with wonder of how it all passed so quickly...flooded with great expectation for what God has in their futures...flooded with thanksgiving for a boy turned young man, who follows hard after Jesus...And so, there I sat, crying one of those out-loud, snubbing, snorting, sniffling, snot-slinging, contorted-face, from-the-gut kind of cries.  It wasn't pretty and I didn't even notice if there were neighbors out walking dogs, or such.  If there were, I'm sure I'm the topic of their dinner conversation tonight!  Anyway, the "senior" tears have finally begun.

I am so incredibly blessed to have mothered Tyler for these 18 1/2 years.  I'm overwhelmed by my faithful God who has gone before us, and redeemed every mistake I've made with Tyler, my "first-born-guinea-pig."  I am filled with all sorts of feelings...but just like the sunshine that soon replaced the rain this morning as I sat out there on that porch, I am thankful for this and every season of motherhood.  Rain is not always desired, but it brings about the most beautiful Spring.  God, in his ever-faithful goodness, has us right here in this place, for such a time as this.  His plans are good.  His way is perfect.  His favor is upon those who's heart is fully devoted to Him.  He is trustworthy.  I see His fingerprints all over the past 18 years, and know He'll have His loving Hand on the years to come. 

This next month is going to be filled with all kinds of celebratory events leading up to graduation, and I'm sure there'll be many a tear shed over the coming weeks, but they'll be tears of joy; not grief.  I have MUCH to celebrate and to be thankful for.  I am truly humbled to be living out this "Dating to Diapers" life with these amazing kids who inspire me so much.

"I have no greater joy than to know my children are walking in Truth."  
3 John 1:4












Sunday, April 19, 2009

Weekend Mischief...

Ni Hao! It's Macy Li here with a recap on my weekend mischief...I've been a pretty busy girl the past few days, so you have to read all the way to the bottom of this post....


While dumping out all my mommy's kitchen drawers, I found these really cool yard-sale stickers...


But daddy said all the money in the world wouldn't buy me!


So I'm praisin' the Lord for that!


And smearing a little "ring-pop" slobber on the sofa...


I went to watch Tater's game...Here he is coming to see me at the fence....I just love how he's not too cool to come and say he loves me, even during his game...


Go Tater!!


Here I am with Nolan between games...


Taylor and me playing in the rocks...Is this what they mean when they
say I'm gonna be a ball-park-rat?


I went to see my great grandmother...the one who'll soon be 100!!!!!!



I found some really pretty new lipstick in Mommy's bathroom drawer...


...so I sat right down on my potty seat and put some on...




...while pondering deep thoughts...


...like "oh crap, she caught me"...


"and uh oh, Mommy just bought this new rug...and this new lipstick..."



So, I ran up to Peyton's room to get into another mess...


...and we found all sorts of stuff...


Howdy Partner!






...but I soon got bored, so I took my clothes off and,
squeezed out a whole tube of hydrocortisone cream I found in the pantry
when I was climbing up a ladder I shouldn't have...





I spent a little time sittin' out on the front porch with my bros...
Man, I LOVE my life!  But wonder what I could get into next...


Peyton, me and Nolan outside storm-watchin'...
Nolan and I wanna be storm-chasers when we grow up.


This is my "I'm about to do something I shouldn't" expression...




...and this is my "I just got away with it" expression...


Here I am tryin' to get Nolan in on it...




Come on Tyler, let's go pull up ALL her tulips!



Since you think you're so fast, catch me if you can, TyTy!
I'm runnin' for the street!



Whatever.  So you ARE fast.  I'll outrun you next time...


After I came in, I needed to eat...Well, they said, "Dive in!"


I'm thinkin' about an avocado facial...


Next time, I think I'll rub a little on my face before I get caught green-handed...


I had a great weekend with the fam...There's still more pics of funny stuff, but my computer-assistant has to get up really early in the morning and she's quittin' on me...

Have a great week everybody!

Love,
Macy Li





Saturday, April 18, 2009

Easter Reflections...Better late than never...

Me, Phillip and my sister cooking Easter dinner...
The joy on his face is a little disturbing...
Nothin' sweeter than a boy and his mama...
"Ring around the rosies"with Goggin and Papa..
Easter cupcakes...Yum Yum!
Macy Li with "NeeNee" at the Easter Egg Hunt...
Tater and his friends don't even know the hunt's goin' on...
They actually resemble each other, don't you think?
Macy Li hunting eggs with her new friend, Baylor...
Baylor was so sweet to help her fill her basket...Baylor made SURE she got her share of candy! haha!
Us with my mom, sister, and neices...
Emily Oatsvall and me (this is Gwen's daughter, for all you out there in blog-land who love her so...isn't she a precious angel?!)
What happened to the Spring temps?
What love!
Easter goodies from "Goggin"...
"Hey, I'll feed my banana to this bunny so I can scarf down all his chocolate!"
Nothin' like havin' a "shiner" on your first Easter!
(She walked straight into the corner of the metal bleachers at Nolan's baseball game the day before)
Can't get enough...
Gettin' ready for church...
The loves of my life...minus one, of course ;)
Aunt Sissy brought goodies, too!
"Let's pray!"
Nanny and Papa Kemp get in on the lovin' after Easter dinner...